Sunday, January 02, 2005

First day on the new job

Kenni's Log Stardate:123456.7

Ha! I always heard Captain Pike doing his log entries that way. My name is Kenni and I work in Engineering on board the U.S.S. Enterprise. I decided to start this log in honor of my new promotion. I am finally working in Warp Drive. I was in Impulse for the last two years and it was really a drag.

My boss, Mr .Scott, is pretty cool. He rides us hard sometimes, but he cuts us some slack when the heat is off. He also turns the other way when we pull pranks on some of the other crew members – especially Lieutenant Kirk, who we all call Lieutenant Jerk”. We rag on him something terrible and he hates us for it. He once swore that when he was captain, he'd make sure that we always got the most dangerous assignments. Like that's ever gonna happen! Who would give command to a brown-nosing guy like that?

My first day in Warp Drive was kinda rough. Everybody picks on the rookie. First they said that the anti-matter was lonely (they said it was a technical term) and that I should go find some uncle-matter. They musta sent me around to 10 different guys before one of them finally busted out laughing. At least I know some people here now, even if they all think I'm an idiot. Next they got me blowing on a pipe because they said the gluons needed to dry. Okay, I learned about gluons in second grade, and I don't remember nothing about them being wet or dry.

So next then they send me rushing in with a patch plate because there's a neutrino leak. I ain't falling for it again so I don't go. Turns out, there really was a neutrino leak and I just about blew the ship up. They stopped messing with me after that. Captain Pike was really pissed when he found out.

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